I will be having my college graduation (convocation if you want to be fancy and technical) on June 21st. I'm sorry but to me that seems crazy. In a society where all we know is school for the first 20 odd years of our lives, being done with that feels like kind of a big deal. Not being a student anymore means a ton of new challenges and adventures to face. Life no longer will revolve around grades and how well I'm doing in school. Relatives will not longer ask how marks are or how school is going, instead it will be "how much money are you making, where are you working, got a girlfriend yet?" and things like that. Life has always centred around how well school was going, it's easy small talk for people you went to high school with and happen to bump into at the mall one day, "hey" "oh uh hey (avoids saying name since they can't remember) ...how's school going?" This creates the facade that they actually care about what you're doing. *spoiler alert* they don't. The last thing they want is for you to say anything other than something along the lines of "good, you?" Keeps the conversation short and sweet.
Being done school forces me into the real world and everybody knows the real world kinda sucks. I mean I'm always open to new adventures, but when these new adventures include paying off all the debt I've accumulated over two years of post secondary education it's kinda hard to get pumped about it. I am looking forward to being independent though. I loved the freedom of living on my own while I was in school. It seems a little odd that after graduating I have to live at home for roughly 6 months and it takes away from one of the biggest positives of growing up; being independent. I know in the long run it will be better. Having no rent makes it easier to pay off OSAP quicker and will help save money to go towards rent in Toronto.
Anyways, back to the good ol' days. I will admit it, I loved grade school, high school and college. I loved being involved win student council and sports teams in high school, I loved being able to be a kid in elementary, I loved being able to feel somewhat like an adult while in college. But all the best part of all three things is that I had barely any responsibilities. There was always an easy fall back plan. With adulthood creeping up I am reminded of all the things I will be facing as a grown up. I loved being a kid. Looking back I don't like the kid I was but I still have some great childhood memories. I wish I could have been more social as a kid, but having to battle to come out of my shell certainly has made me stronger today. I will miss summer vacation, although I've had a job the past four summers it's just weird this summer knowing I won't be leaving the job to go back to school. This is the end of summer vacation and the beginning of real life living. Soon I'll be living in Toronto and these memories will be cherished even more. I know the first few weeks I will have Taylor Swift's song "Never Grow Up" on repeat.
I have definitely grown up a lot since I was a kid and I am definitely happy I did. The growing up in that song is different than the way I have grown up. Maybe I've matured, not necessarily grown up. I know when I have to be professional and seem like an adult but I can still act like a kid when I want to. I love embracing my childish ways. I love acting like a goofball. I even love the fact I still sleep with a teddy bear. I like to be youthful. I've grown up in the sense that being called names doesn't bother me, I won't run around the playground crying because the girl I like started dating someone. (My low point of my elementary school career and one of the most embarrassing things I've ever done)
So the good ol' days of being care free are behind and I believe some truly amazing days are yet to come. It's healthy to reflect but I'm not one to dwell on the past. I will jump into every challenge that is ahead of me and face them knowing they will make me a better person. I will never stop learning. After all, this is my life...in training. :)
Thanks for reading (it probably dragged on)
Phil
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